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  • Writer's pictureOlajumoke

WHY DIDN’T THEY TELL US SEF?

I finally got home at about 10:16 pm after successfully pulling through the day’s demands at the office and sitting for what seems like some ‘endless hours’ in traffic. I didn’t only look exhausted as usual, I actually felt really drained.

My loving mother, a typical Nigerian mother had prepared dinner as usual and I didn’t want to be that ingrate of a child by telling her how I felt too tired to eat. As I struggled to finish my food and answered my mum’s many questions on how the day went, I also prepared to ask her one major question that I had had in my mind for a while.

Finally, I spilled it.

‘Why didn’t you and daddy tell me that adulthood was hard? You only told me to go to school, study hard, come out with excellent grades and afterwards, I would get a fantastic job, get married and live happily ever after, that sounded good but in reality, it’s quite hard’

.

.

.

I mean, everyone around us had told us to study hard as children. Apart from this ‘study hard advice’, every other advice seemed to be centered on being morally or religiously upright.

All I thought was that once I studied hard and graduated successfully, I would just get a good job, then get the man of my dreams, have kids, build an empire, grow gray and cute and have life all figured out.

Nobody talked about how many interviews and how many reject emails I might have to deal with before finally getting ‘the job’, and that is even if I eventually get it. Nobody talked about the option/choice of getting straight to do my own thing if getting a job was not panning out or was not a thing of interest for me. Nobody talked about dealing with bad bosses, frustrating clients, piled up work, overwhelming schedules, the deadline dilemma, the kind of customers that owe, failed relationships, heartbreaks, financial decisions, bills, marriage pressure, societal and social media pressure, financial, physical and emotional demands from friends, family, spouse, kids, jobs, religious organizations, other social groups, skin problems, amongst other issues of life.

.

.

.

*sighs*

My mother’s response was simple, ‘At least you are living the life now, it will be easy for you in Jesus name, finish your food and go to bed’.

Well, what can I do, I am living the life now and my parents definitely tried in their own ways to prepare me for this phase and I still can do well with their guidance.

But why didn’t they even tell us the tough side of growing up sef?

*Still thinking*

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